AvGeek at 24 Cedar St Nothing Like Loser Train Enthusiast Neighbor

Bob Finch, 52, a software engineer who recently built a full 737 sim in his garage, which he calls his “hangar,” is nothing at all like his loser train enthusiast neighbor who built a miniature railroad in his backyard.

“My wife says I should just go over there and make friends,” Bob said, donning some cheap Walmart aviators and a patch-covered flight jacket he found on eBay, “But that guy is a loser! He looks completely ridiculous riding that little train around in his yard. You know he actually wears a conductor hat when he’s out riding that thing?!”

His wife, Patty, said she doesn’t understand why the boys just won’t play nice because they are practically into the same things.

“It’s totally different!” Bob shouted from the other room, where he was busy installing new rudders for his Microsoft simulator.

According to his neighbor, Steve, Bob is just jealous. “Trains are so much cooler than planes!” he said, showing us his extensive model train collection in the basement.

Others in the neighborhood said the two men throw passive-aggressive jabs at each other every time they are out, with Bob calling Steve “train boy” and Steve calling Bob “wannabe pilot.”

Steve’s wife, Cindy, just ignores the situation. “I leave cookies out for both of them when I see them out playing,” she said. “Maybe one day they’ll both reach for the same cookie and decide to be friends.”