EXCLUSIVE! – Amelia Earhart Found Alive and Well in Fayette County, Georgia

Thanks to one of our readers, Aviation Daily News has learned that – not only did Amelia Earhart survive her attempt to circumnavigate the globe in 1937, she is miraculously still alive and well at 120 years old! We sent one lucky writer down to Fayette County, Georgia for an exclusive interview with the legend herself.

Aviation Daily: AMELIA, wow. First, let me say, especially as a female aviator like yourself, what a huge honor it is to meet you and how exciting it is to learn you survived!

Amelia Earhart: Well, it’s nice to meet you too, deary. What’s this about an aerator?

Aviation Daily: The mystery of your whereabouts has been haunting the world for decades, tell us everything!

Amelia: Well, there’s really not much to know. I’ve been right here in Georgia for the last 93 years. Look behind you, those are my great great grandchildren in that photo, Sammy, Julia, little Stevie… he’s a troublemaker, that Stevie… and Addison. Isn’t she just a doll? And in the photo next to it is…

Aviation Daily: So, what happened over the Pacific anyway? Did your plane crash? Did you land safely? And what happened to Fre…

Amelia: Last time I took a plane it was to visit my brother in Omaha. He died 26, no… 27 years ago.

Aviation Daily: There was speculation that the Japanese were involved.

Amelia: The Japanese? Oh, no, Daniel died in a hunting accident. Shot square between the eyes.

Aviation Daily: No, I meant…

Amelia: Like this… *simulates pumping a shotgun* POW!  You shoulda seen him go down! Like a tree in the woods! A big old fat bastard tree.

Aviation Daily: I meant…

Amelia: I’d do it again.

Aviation Daily: I… wait, what?

Aviation Daily: So one of the juiciest theories out there was that Amelia Earhart was actually a spy for FDR. Is there any truth to that?

Amelia: FDR! *laughs* You know, I remember back when I was a little girl, my teacher, Ms Parsons was her name… strange lady, blind as a bat… said she always thought that Lincoln feller was quite the looker.

Aviation Daily: Ok, one last question. Do you have any regrets about not completing that flight?

Amelia: The one to Omaha? I visited my brother, Daniel, there. He died 26… no, 27 years ago. Hunting accident.

Aviation Daily: Amelia, thank you so much for taking the time to meet with us today, and for offering Aviation Daily News this exciting exclusive. It really meant a lot!

Amelia: That’s nice, dear. Hand me that bottle of Jack on the table on your way out. No glass.

When our Aviation Daily News writer handed her the bottle of Jack, they noticed, tucked behind the liquor glasses on a stack of old newspapers, a necklace…

George P. Putnam, Amelia Earhart’s late husband.
That, or a young Stephen Colbert.
Actually, it could also be Greg Kinnear… hmm.

We think it’s safe to call it – Amelia Earhart Mystery: CASE CLOSED